August 12, 2011
One thing I love about our weekly list of top ten Fathead sellers is that it genuinely reflects what’s happening in America. And this week is no different. Just by looking at the list, I know what the American people have been doing (hint, hint, the NFL must be past the lockout)!
2) Kobe Bryant – This obviously indicates that people are rushing to get his Lakers Fathead before we discontinue it and start making him in his Turkish uniform.
3) Boston Red Sox Logo – This is because Sox fans are gloating about taking the Yankees series.
4) Dwyane Wade Drives – Fans are obviously excited about the potential of a Big Three playing for Turk Telekom.
5) Derek Jeter – A group of people trapped in a mine for the last 40 days just escaped and found out that Jeter crossed the 3,000 hit mark.
6) Pittsburgh Steelers Logo – Mike Tomlin just won the National Omar Epps Look-alike Contest, and fans are celebrating by buying Steelers Fatheads.
7) Inside Fenway Park Mural – Have you ever been inside Fenway Park? Who wouldn’t want one of these murals?
8) Boston Celtics Logo – No idea. People do know that there might not be a season, don’t they?
9) Philadelphia Eagles Logo – Every high-profile player signed by the Eagles received an Eagles Logo Fathead. Thus, we sold a crap load of them this week.
10) Kevin Durant Dunk Mural – Not sure, but there’s a rumor that some dude told Durant before his Rucker Park game, “I’ll buy one Durant Dunk Mural for every point you make today.”
September 17, 2008
By Apryl DeLancey
What is going on? Is this backwards day (again) for the second Sunday of the regular NFL season? LaDainian Tomlinson was the first pick in almost everyone’s Fantasy draft this year. His athletic ability is amazing and his demeanor admirable. No trash talk – just a hard-working guy that lets his game do the talking. So what’s the story? Why the low output so far? Is football boring him? He hasn’t delivered his usual multiple TD performance yet – and he certainly doesn’t look very LT-like. What happened to his “better” being better than everyone else’s?
Do you remember the Charger’s last game of the ‘07 season? Tomlinson was reportedly injured and sat on the bench – hiding with the helmet on. It was as if he wanted to disappear from his own existence. Everyone wondered what was going on with him. Why was he just sitting there? It looked like he could still play….
Fantasy Owners and Chargers’ fans are now left wondering: what will happen for the rest of the season? These first two weeks of the NFL has the Chargers losing by the slimmest of margins. One loss was to a very lucky Carolina Panthers team and the next to an equally fortunate Denver Broncos team. If Tomlinson had been “on” and performing up to expectations, these games may have taken a very different turn. Seriously, had LT racked up a few touchdowns, then the pass on the last play from Jake Delhomme would have been for ego and not the win. Had LT turned in a “normal” LT day, it wouldn’t have mattered that Ed Hochuli blew the call at the end of the game that led to the Broncos win.
Come back, LaDainian! We miss your breakout performances! We long for those games where you rush, catch, and throw for a touchdown. Where are those games where you rack up unheard of numbers? Please, come back very soon. I won’t be able to bear it if I see you on the free agent wire in my Fantasy League….
Fathead Disclaimer: While Apryl’s opinions are in no way endorsed by Fathead, we can legally concur with several points: 1) LT does have amazing athletic ability and an admirable demeanor. 2) The Carolina Panthers are a lucky team: they have two of the leagues top 20 runners this season and Steve Smith is back on the roster too. 3) The Broncos are fortunate: not only did they have John Elway for years, they now have the Cutler/Royal dynamic duo! Okay, this wasn’t much of a disclaimer…we just wanted to get our two cents in!